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Dec 31, 2019

Today, we are continuing the conversation about how to cultivate a more loving presence through the Five A's offered by David Richo.

The Five A's are Attention, Acceptance, Appreciation, Affection, and Allowing.

If you missed episode ERP 195: 5 Essential Elements Of Love - Part- One, I encourage you to listen to it before listening to this episode, as it gives context for this conversation as well as discusses the first 2 A's.

(Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories and examples.) 

In this episode, Dr. Jessica Higgins discusses: 

  • The challenges of not receiving appreciation and how this can affect us both personally and relationally.
  • How offering specific appreciations can increase the positive impact.  
  • Affection refers not just to physical contact, but also to the feeling of being close through conversation, gestures, and presence. 
  • Allowing means letting someone be themselves and giving them the freedom to do things in their own way. 
  • The difference between trying to control your partner and setting limits and boundaries for yourself. 
  • The importance of giving the 5 A's to others AND giving the 5 A's to ourselves. 

"Being a fair witness requires a healthy ego, because distance and objectivity are unavailable to someone with poor boundaries, no tolerance of ambiguity, and no sense of a personal center." by David Richo



Website: David Richo's website

Book: How To Be An Adult In Relationships - Five Keys to Mindful Living, by David Richo


Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins:  






Twitter: @DrJessHiggins 



If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the “Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins” button here. 

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If you are interested in developing new skills to overcome relationship challenges, please consider taking the Connected Couple Program or engaging in relationship coaching work with me.