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Sep 22, 2020

Love presents a great opportunity, and it can also feel like a great risk. Especially, when we have felt hurt in the past. If we are not conscious (and aware), we can mistake the fear we feel as an indication that something is off in the relationship or with our partner. The key is to recognize the fear you feel makes sense (understand it's origins) and learn how to work with the fear, so that you can learn to develop more intimacy with your significant other. In the episode, I reference the book "The Highly Sensitive Person In Love," by Elaine Aron. 

(Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories, and examples.)

 

In this episode, Dr. Jessica Higgins discusses: 

  • How we question our lovability when we have felt hurt in the past. 
  • How love and intimacy can be threatening. 
  • Fear of loss of control and how to deal with it. 
  • Fear of one's "attack and destroy" impulses and what to do about it. 
  • Fear of being engulfed and how to take care of yourself. 
  • Fear of commitment and what to consider.
  • Fear of disliking the other for subtle annoyances and how to negotiate this with your partner. 

  "Love feels whole, energizing and integrating all parts of us. But wholeness would also mean integrating any repressed, split-off anger and destructiveness." by Elaine Aaron

 

Mentioned: 

Connect with Dr. Jessica Higgins:  

Facebook: facebook.com/EmpoweredRelationship 

Instagram: instagram.com/drjessicahiggins 

Podcast: drjessicahiggins.com/podcasts 

Pinterest: pinterest.com/EmpowerRelation 

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drjessicahiggins 

Twitter: @DrJessHiggins 

Website: drjessicahiggins.com  

Email: jessica@drjessicahiggins.com

 

 

If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the “Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins” button here. 

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If you are interested in developing new skills to overcome relationship challenges, please consider taking the Connected Couple Program or engaging in relationship coaching work with me.